1) Your favourite one player game of “guess the nationality of the new person/people, before they have spoken” has finally achieved a success rate of approximately 97%
2) You can’t remember what it felt like to shower without wearing flip-flops (thongs). You know what goes on in those showers after dark!
3) You have learned swear words or dirty phrases in at least 3 different languages to your own.
4) You know that if you stumble into the shared bathroom in the morning to find someone in “your shower”, the rest of the day is automatically doomed to failure.
5) Despite being a people person you have found yourself building a “fortress of solitude” by tying sheets, towels, anything available around your bottom bunk, on at least 2 occasions.
6) One of your worst fears in life is now walking into the hostel kitchen to find out your weekly shop that you did yesterday (including the luxury items you took in and out of your basket 3 times before guiltily purchasing) has gone missing, and has either A) been consumed by other backpackers or B) Thrown out by the cleaner. This is why you label your food kids.
7) You visually check every surface before sitting down and mentally run through your head for any recent stories of said surface being used for anything other than it’s designed purpose.
8) No human behaviour really shocks you anymore because you have witnessed it all already. Drunken rowdy behaviour, check. Promiscuous guests, check. Vomit, piss and shit…sadly check. Yes, people can be animals.
9) You find yourself doing a happy dance when you find your roomates have moved on and you have the dorm to yourself for a night, (possibly naked if that’s your style).
10) When the words “we’re off to the bottleshop, want anything?” fill you with both glee and fear simultaneously!
11) Despite moaning on a daily basis about sharing a dorm room, you are actually slightly freaked out by the thought of having a room to yourself for any prolonged period. Lonely…oh so lonely!
12) You have virtually become nocturnal. Either through partying so much into the wee hours, or from many nights of disturbed sleep from other backpackers checking in/out, or generally just being douchebags
13) You find yourself referring to the hostel as “home” when speaking to other people
14) You have written an entire novel on reasons for why you really need a bottom bunk and are no longer scared of using dirty tactics to get it!
15) After a rubbish day you actually look forward to going back, because you know your awesome hostel family is there to listen to you vent and will feed you alcohol and tim tams until you have forgotten exactly why you were upset in the first place.
Bonus no. 16) You have found yourself so bored and sleep deprived on a rainy day, that you have found yourself seeing if you can fit into the tumble dryer, much to the confusion of the other guests doing their laundry!
Please comment on your hostel experiences below and if you can relate to any of these, please share!
Creative unicorn ninja; Travel vlogger/blogger. Green tea enthusiast and lover of dance and art. Currently be found back in England planning the next adventure! Southeast Asia Odyssey coming very soon!
Where I can be found: UK